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From the Farm

Toss the datebook out the window

July 10, 2009
By Kerry Hoffman

Who knew a person could get so out of a schedule when he or she goes on vacation. I think I was probably a teenager the last time I went to bed at 11 p.m. and slept in until 9 a.m. It feels like half the day is gone.

Yes, I am on vacation - again. This time I had to bring Steve and Russell with for the fun. We are on our annual pilgrimage to the resort at Clitherall Lake. In fact, we have increased in number. Joey brought a friend along; as did Russell. (I like this vacation. Unlike the charge per minute Internet available in Europe, the resort has free wireless Internet. I should even have time to proof-read this one.)

Our week is filled with lazy days and some good hearty laughing. Sure we also go out and try to snag some fish, but for some reason we are not very successful at bringing in supper. Let me rephrase that. Steve and I are not very successful at bringing in the fishes and feeding the masses.

Article Photos

Kerry Hoffman

On the other hand, my brother Kurt and his family always seem to have the uncanny ability to find the hot spots and bring in a heaping basket of sunfish, crappies, northern and largemouth bass.

I threaten Steve that I am going to go fish with my brother, so I can actually real in the whoppers - fish larger, and weighing more, than the one-dollar 1976 coin I have in my Sheephead kitty.

Maybe that's why Steve takes me to the empty fishing holes. He's actually trying to get me out of his 16-foot Lund fishing boat and into my brother's.

My nieces and I had a makeup party one of the first days. They showed me how to apply green and blue eye shadow. Personally, I liked the green shadow I had on the left eyelid. The blue on the right eyelid brought back horrific memories of the blue eye shadow popular in the 80s. Steve thought I should really put the same color on both eyelids. Obviously, he doesn't have a clue about makeup and makeup parties.

He didn't understand the concept of "test run," to see which color looks best.

We also had a girl's day of shopping in downtown Battle Lake and Fergus Falls. We always eat at Stella's restaurant. This year, I stepped outside the box, a big thing for me in a restaurant, and I had calamari. For those of you not familiar with calamari, it's squid. And it was good! For the main course I had Thai Chicken Salad with a spicy peanut dressing. That was also awesome. I finished with tingling lips, due to the sauce having a bit of zip.

We fill most of our days with bone-chilling inner-tube rides. Years ago, Dad would torture us on the water skis - dragging us through whipping cat tails. When the grandchildren came along, he purchased a massive tube that three people can lie on while he whips around the lake. When he pulls the grandchildren, we invariable hear some whining about how, "Grandpa should go faster. We want to catch some air." (Usually, it's all the girls complaining.)

I was lucky and was able to be pulled on the tube all by myself this year. Grandpa tried to toss me off that tube in the worst way. He seems to think I am that teenager he used mercilessly try and toss off the tube. He forgets that more than 25 years have passed and I am pushing the old-lady envelope.

My muscles are killing me!

I must admit, I successfully clung to the tube for dear life. It was so invigorating, that as soon as I finished my tube ride, I walked up to the beach and grabbed the water skis. I love water skiing. I only fell twice, when I was getting up and out of the water, and that was because I felt like my swim shorts were around my ankles. Nobody wants to see my blinding moon in the middle of the day.

Wednesday Steve and I hosted a Corn Hole tournament (bean bag toss) for all the guests at the resort. Entry fee is a buck. Winner takes all. This year, attendance is down. Only eight teams entered. Last year, team Captain Morgan won it all. I can't believe these two Green Bay Packer fans actually have the guts to show up. Of course, this year they won it all. They defeated Steve and me by a score of 21 to 11.

Although it's good to get away, it's also good to get home. Steve's good friend actually finished a portion of our landscaping while we were away. He sent a photo on his phone; we sent a photo of two beers as a way to say, "Thanks."

I want to get home, get back into my work routine, which means going to bed early and rising before half the day is gone.

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